In the ether

it
breaks
my
heart

knowing that you're out there
hurting wanting
feeling alone and impotent in the confines
of a life
that lives you

knowing that you're navigating monsters that live inside your head
on your own
makes me want to reach through miles and miles of darkness
to
you

because i am contained in the silent ether of your mind
i cannot help in a way
that feels real

i can't give you the comfort of
a smile
a hug
a touch
a knowing look
i can't offer all that i have

to you

and
i want to
i want to

A special friendship.
Magic.
I love that you bring out the
funny
intellect
biting
loving
sides of me all rolled up into a stimulating ball of hilarious
loving
interaction.

Words can't capture.

can

they.

Could this magical, silent, friendship last forever
just as it is now.
Would that be so bad?
No..... not if i look at it through the windows of

each
moment

the unanticipated
spontaneous
times
we both appear in the same place
shock my mind
with glee
and joy
and electric connection.

you make me laugh & wonder & long for.

There is so much I don't know.

a
b
o
u
t

y
o
u
.

Your life, a canvas with only smudges of color that
i can see.
Yet I know it is rich in it's fullness.
Your depth and texture
your unique injured purity

speak to me.


I am here. In silent ether.
The secret confines of your mind
hidden behind

cheerios and baseball practice
arguments over bill collectors and paint colors
the drive to a job that fills the days to fill your wallet

hidden behind the furniture
neighbors
moves
questions
hurts

daily daily

i remain.

your.
friend.