Tuesday, July 17, 2007

afar

saying goodbye is difficult for me.
even when it is clear to
every
clear
minded
person
that goodbye is the right course of action.

i often get commended for keeping in touch with people I have known.
i am quite good at it.
If I do say so myself.

but what they don't know
is that
there is
a
girl that lives within me
that fears
letting go
and being left behind by those i have been loved by.

sounds silly
i know. im working on it.

i reach out to people i have loved

recently
long ago

because
when i love someone
i never don't.
love.
them.
in.
some.
way.

a hard concept for some to imagine.

yet, it seems within the
joys of possibility
that
a love
can take many forms. and can shift. or change. or learn to be. something new.

a lover
a friend
a husband
a confidant
an occasional but real connection.

it has taken me quite awhile to see that
there are people who don't see it this way

at all.
when a relationship alters, it is gone. for good.

rest
in
peace.

well, i have made best friends and kept them
because my affinity for them
has an iron grip.

i wouldn't change it
for the world.

but there are hazzards in the practice.
and i have to be reminded
that there are some
people that i have loved
that i
would be wise to
love from
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
afar.

Monday, July 09, 2007

friends.

i have amazing friends.
i really do. if i have done something outstanding in this lifetime, it is to have made
incredible friends.
some of them i see often.
some rarely.
but i cherish each and every one.

i had lunch with an old friend today.
i haven't seen this person in almost 2 years.
yet, when we sat down, the distance melted into nothing
and we were right back where we always are when we get together.
it's like the rest of the world is
happening in a morph where i can see it
but it just doesn't matter
because i am enfolded in joyous contentment

sharing secrets
encouraging eachother
affirming truths
laughing together.

it was good.

I have seen many of my dear friends of late
and i am so grateful

reminded of
what i love
about
them.

If I have done one thing for which I am very proud
It is to have made these friends.

A
treasure
more
valued
than
gold.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

crap i tell ya.

looking glass
looking glass

why do i feel shame
so often
when i look your way?

where did i read somewhere
long ago
that there is a list
of ways to be
when gazed upon?

The Book of You

Chapter One through never ending....

smooth skin
clear like a babies
always
aging must not show
narrow lines
hide
round
curves
for they will offend

When was I taught that the lines
my experience on this planet have written
on my eyes
are wrong?

Where did I accept that my soft
round
belly and behind
are
a sign
of failure

Why was did I learn that
there is always something
that is not ok
with
me
?

How has it taken me
forty glorious years
to realize that
this
is
all

CRAP.

:)

thanks

i am so grateful
for every moment that i realize that
there is something for me to

learn

i am grateful for the wisdom of those who have come
before me
since me
for those who have the courage to speak

wisdom

no matter it's source.

Buddha
Jesus
Aunt Jane
Crazy Ned on the corner
Father Patric
Bishop Jones
Mother Theresa
your 3 year old child
a whisper of love during a still moment alone


the wisdom that lives in

life

that lives
in

it
them
you
me

i am grateful for every moment
that a corner of
darkness is illuminated
by

a word
a thought
a deed
a song
a choice
a gift
a seemingly meaningless act

I am grateful that every second is rich with abundant love

if
I
am
willing
to
see.